This is a question sent in by Sad Single on the “Ask Aaron Anything” link:
| Why are single women in church treated differently than married couples. They are almost forgotten and it seems that the only place is in the kitchen helping with the potluck. We do have a voice, too. |
My Answer:
I am am sorry you feel this way. I know that depends on which church you go to. I know it is not ours because we do not do potlucks. LOL! I am sorry about the joke I just have not been in a potluck in awhile. Now one thing I think is crazy is singles being treated as incomplete and second class. For some reason in our “american church culture” you cannot minister completely unless you are married. I think singles can do a bunch more in the ministry because they are single, at life connection a huge portion of our leaders are single people. Now, they all want to get married (LOL) but anywhoo they are single right now. There is nothing wrong with being single and it should be a time that you are going all out for Jesus and the ministry.
Bless you single people and let me give you a word of advice because I know the opposite is true in our church there is a lot of single people and instead of embracing it they are fantizing about marriage. Do not wast your single years dreaming of the time you can get married. Utilize the time you have for the glory of JESUS!!!
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“why are single women treated differently than married couples?”
Because single women and married couples have two entirely different things they should be doing in the church lol. They’re treated different for good reasons. which BTW is biblical. Single women are not in the position to help in areas that married women are. That’s not to say there’s no place for single women or men, but single women and men really shouldn’t be giving relationship advice to other women and men, etc.
just as single men and children and teenagers and married couples are all treated different. To be brutally honest, we’re not all equal. we have different tasks each “group” of people should be doing in the church and other tasks that should be absolutely avoided by certain groups in the church.
Mark Driscoll says man and women were created equal but different. Worldly knowledge tends to forget that. women cannot be equal to the things men are designed to do, no matter what anyone tells you. and men are not equal to things women are designed to do. no matter what anyone tells you.
…you know it would probably be easier to talk to you about your question if you would say what exactly you’re asking about when you say treated differently? What are you refering to? you can be honest here, if you do you’ll get an answer that’ll be much more what you’re looking for…
Amen =D! All I can say is, being single (man OR woman) shouldn’t keep people from doing the things that God called us to do, even though you’re treated differently than the married people. Maybe because the American culture see singles as “happy-go-lucky” when it comes to tasks & stuff, but that shouldn’t be. We tend to follow worldly standards, when we should be following God’s standards, & every single standard is already given to us in a form of a Bible, God’s Word. That includes how treating people. So, being treated differently according to what God says, is actually good =).
As a single male leader I am grateful. God has truly blessed me in this season to be able to dedicate my life to serving as an intern at LCC which has brought such a deeper intamacy with Him. He is taking me to new levels spiritually and it wouldn’t be possible had I stepped out of His will and married someone. The desire is there to be married, it is a Godly desire, however I am embracing this time of sanctity. I am learning first hand that no one or thing completes me. None but Jesus. So my advice would be to remain single and seek the Lord. I trust in Him that there is a Woman there, but first we must abide in Him. Live by faith and understand that His plan is perfect. Patience, peace,longsuffering are all fruits of the spirit as we all know, apply them to your life and the outcome will be far greater than you can fathom.
hey guys,
thanks for the input and the testimonies. You all are some good men and I know that you will make great husbands. Bless ya!
I was really worried about me being single for a long time but I realized there is more to life than just worrying about being single. I am not alone. My family, friends, and especially God are with me. I trust God to provide the right woman for me at the right time. For now, I would enjoy being single and learn more what God has in store for me.
Ed,
Good stuff… and hey we got a lot i mean a lot of amazing Godly women at LCC. LOL. I joke!!! but we do!
I find it interesting that someone has asked a question about single women in the church and the replies are about guys (some of whom at least have roles single women wouldn’t be offered) who’s answers are about their own experience of looking forward to being married one day.
I don’t know if the person asking the question has the feeling of being an ‘invisible person’ in the church but this helps to demonstrate why others certainly do.
Drew, was Jesus single or married, was Paul single or married, then why do u seem to think. I will tell you what, single people are given positions and responsibilities iin the church based on how safe their married peers will be, married people are inferior through and throuh !! Jeus fellowshipped with single women, he got a single ex-prostitute woman to witness his ressurection, he was very close to Lazrus’s single sisters, Paul wrote a lot to admonish the church on marital issues, yet he himself never did marry. I think heaven is disgusted st people like you who value individuals based on marital status. If you weer a pastor, I would tell all single women to run away from you. Utter inferiority if u ask me.
I lost my husband of 25 years just over a year ago and started back to church . I loved it there . Funny thing there are only 6 people that goes to that church . They have been married from 38 years to 60 years . I live on a farm and had worked along side with my husband .If it was grass cutting we both cut grass , if it was washing we both worked together , we cooked together we did everything together . We canned together and we sewed together . There was nothing we did not do together . Now being by myself it is hard to find someone that will help me . I have a helper now when he is not working for other people . If he is cutting bush I am there helping as well. Not a relationship .I went to church a month ago and the preacher asked me what I did that day . I told him that I had waited 3 weeks for someone to come out and cut some fallen limbs so i could cut the grass . No one showed up so I started the chain saw myself and cut them up . Just before the service the preacher said June , how do I put this . He mentioned the other two men's name and said we like our women to act like ladies . The men turned around and laughed at me .Then added that the church needed to be cleaned . With that he said the WOMEN will work inside and the MEN will work outside . This statement really cut deep . Cause I can run a chain saw or drive a tractor make me less than a soon to be 64 year old woman ? A friend that I have known for about 9 years is a member there as well. She said that the preacher said he was so very sorry he said those words to me .She has turned her back on me as well. Said I had issues to deal with . I have never gone back .
women who are single in the church f&%$ around. this article is bullsh^%