I am avoiding a person at church, what should I do?

This is a question sent in by anonymous on the “Ask Aaron Anything” link:

ok, i been feeling lately like i have been avoiding this one person at church. so i want to tell her that im not doing it on purpose and i do care for her. we hanged out a couple of time and we got a little close but it still feels like im still avoiding her. what should i do?

My Answer:

This sunday we talked about unity that is rooted in the gospel.

Ephesians 4:2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

Relationships are tough because there are two depraved, messed up humans who have their own emotions, feelings, and perceptions.  To have great relationships there has to be a strong foundation of Jesus focused people who are practicing repentance, forgiveness, patience, and love.   All of these things are not natural but are spirit led and important to healthy relationships.

Now with your relationship if you feel like you are avoiding her I know it will be a little humbling to approach her and ask for forgiveness for avoiding her, but I think that is the biblical thing to do.  She may not even feel like you were, or even have noticed, but for the sake of the relationship, the church, and Christ, it is better to humble yourself and talk with her.  If you have some offense or reason for avoidance then try and forgive or deal with that also.

Relationships and unity are valuable in scripture and it is a priority of every believer to not run from, but to give every effort for restored relationships.  Blessings!