How does one deal with an unbelieving husband who may feel like he’s being “replaced” by Jesus?

This is a question sent in by Leslie on the “Ask Aaron Anything” link:

So, I asked this question to Heather during group last night, and she had very wise words for me.  I thought I’d post the question here as well, just to be able to have your take on the issue, and also to share it with my church family:

How does one deal with an unbelieving husband who may feel like he’s being “replaced” by Jesus?

(It’s not that I love Pat less now than I did before, in fact, I’d wager to say I love him even more. However, it is true that although I want to be a good and loving wife to him, my first priority is the relationship with my Lord – and Pat KNOWS that is now my priority.)

My Answer:

What you are sensing is that Pat is not your idol anymore. You did more then just love him before, you worshipped him as your savior. He wanted to be your everything but he could not be that for you. So now you love him more but you do not worship him. So that is new for him, he is used to a woman that more then loved and respected him but worshipped him. He is not getting that anymore. So as a wife of an unbelieving husband you want to learn how to give him biblical respect and love. It is better but it is different. Let him see Christ in your life by the way you serve him and love him. Find the things that he really wants and if they are not sin against God work to give those things to him. Let him see the difference between false worship and the biblical respect and love that a Godly wife can give. I am proud of you and so thankful for the example you are to this Church. Bless you all!